farting around with agents mulder and scully

X Files MulerScully bw 1600

FARTING AROUND with agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully is some­thing that mil­lions of us would enjoy. That said, I want to call at­ten­tion to words ex­changed in a con­ver­sa­tion be­tween with those and former agent Dales in The X-Files episode ti­tled “Agua Mala.” Arthur Dales was the orig­inal person in charge of the FBI’s X-Files and is now re­tired and living in Florida. READ MORE

my psychic girlfriend

ShirleyMacLaine

BEFORE I MET BERNI—the light of my life, the fickle of my fancy—I dated a lot of women. Tried dating through the Per­sonals sec­tion at the back of the local week­lies here in Seattle (The Stranger and Seattle Weekly). Need­less to say, I had a lot of in­ter­esting ex­pe­ri­ences, none of which lasted long. READ MORE

because she could see the future!

Psychic CrystalBall 2000

BEFORE I MET BERNI—who is the light of me life, the fickle of me fancy, my reason for laughing for crying for living for dying (she’s my soul and my heart’s inspiration!)—I dated a lot of women. I mean, a LOT. Once, about sev­en­teen years ago, I almost—ALMOST!!!—had a gen­uine psy­chic girl­friend! READ MORE

old habits die hard bump shooosh, bump shooosh

OLD HABITS DIE HARD. Who has not heard that hoary saw? Whether it’s al­ways so, I don’t know, but I do know that cer­tain habits that I formed while sharing a bed with my brother Charles when we were kids be­came SO much a part of me, that I simply ceased to no­tice their pres­ence in my nightly rit­uals. READ MORE