the rude pundit says you don’t win the new civil war by being civil

Es­ti­mated reading time is 4 min­utes.

“THE RUDE PUNDIT.” That what he calls him­self and I haven’t been able to stop reading his rants. I should say here that if his writ­ings are rants, my writ­ings on this blog that I label “rants” are mere farts a-blowin’ in the wind. The Rude Pundit does not let up—with the facts, with the out­rage at those facts, and with no way to com­mu­ni­cate that out­rage without re­sorting to the four-letter-word-syndrome that “lively-ups” the Eng­lish language.

Se­ri­ously folks, the Rude Pundit glee­fully reaches into the bottom of the barrel of filth for his ob­scen­i­ties and throws them up at us for our con­sid­er­a­tion the way that Lenny Bruce shocked his au­di­ence with his lan­guage into paying at­ten­tion or that the early Richard Pryor took his al­most ex­clu­sively black au­di­ences into the bowels and the in­ter­work­ings of one word—and y’all know that THAT word is, doncha?

So, I am highly rec­om­mending you lev­i­tate your way on over to the Rude Pun­dit’s site and start reading!

My fa­vorite so far is the RP’s ad­vice to New Jersey De­moc­rats in Con­gress when dealing with the ob­struc­tionism and lies of their Re­pub­lican brethren: “You don’t win the new Civil War by being civil.”

I wanted to give you a better take on this RP’s ap­proach, but se­lecting one rant/posting was damn near im­pos­sible. So I just placed the scroll bar on the open Google window all the way back to the top, and then just scrolled down and inch or so and where it landed is what I chose.

So, here is the Rude Pun­dit’s post ti­tled “Spying and Drones: What the Hell Is Wrong With Us?” (Oc­tober 24, 2013, ). I have re­moved the middle por­tion of this so that it is a briefer read—this is, after all, an introduction—and it leaves the whole of the post to be read by you again with the en­tirety of the con­tent, making it read like new . . .

Slap away at our contorted faces

“No, se­ri­ously, what the f*ck is wrong with us? Are we that crazed about our own pre­cious safety that we simply don’t give a shit any­more about what other na­tions think when it comes to us ‘pro­tecting’ our­selves from ‘ter­ror­ists’? At this point, the United States views the world as one giant con­spiracy out to de­stroy truth, jus­tice, and high school foot­ball. We’re so bugf*ck in­sane that Osama bin Laden must be laughing his crab-bitten ass off at the bottom of the ocean.

What it looks like is that, starting in 2006, under or­ders from George W. Bush, the Na­tional Se­cu­rity Agency began mon­i­toring the calls of dozens of for­eign leaders. How did the NSA start doing so? Be­cause some US of­fi­cial gave the spooks the per­sonal or di­rect phone num­bers of the leaders. Ain’t that some shit right there? It’s like showing all the guys at the bar pic­tures of your girl­friend’s tits that you as­sured her were only for you. . . .

And be­fore anyone tries to say this is no big deal, much ado about nothing, meta­data, or what­ever self-deluding non­sense you wanna toss onto the shit­pile, what’s more im­por­tant, huh? Hearing An­gela Merkel order take-out bratwurst or what­ever the f*ck they do in Ger­many? Or as­suring on­going co­op­er­a­tion from our, you know, al­lies? ‘Cause those al­leged al­lies are al­ready thinking of telling the United States to go f*ck it­self on sharing spy information.


Is Obama so con­cerned to be seen as a tough motherf*cker at home that he doesn’t re­ally care what people over­seas think about the spying and the drones missiles?


Of course, a little phone and email eaves­drop­ping would be prefer­able for the people of Pak­istan and Yemen, where Oba­ma’s drone war is killing the shit out of civil­ians. Like, you know, the mul­tiple strikes on an im­pov­er­ished vil­lage close to the border with Afghanistan as they were about to enjoy an evening meal at the end of a long day of work in July 2012.

The US re­ported that as a suc­cessful ter­rorist murder op­er­a­tion, but Amnesty In­ter­na­tional dis­cov­ered that it was, in fact, 18 la­borers, in­cluding a 14-year old boy, who had f*ck-all to do with ter­rorism. There’s lots more like that in both coun­tries where we rain fiery death on the people.

What’s the game here? Is it that once Obama was shown the real threats to the United States, the shit we’re all too stupid to be al­lowed to see, he lost his f*ckin’ mind and de­cided to go sur­vivalist? Or is it that Obama is so con­cerned, like De­moc­rats be­fore him, to be seen as a tough motherf*cker at home that he doesn’t re­ally care what people over­seas think about the spying and the drones missiles?

The Rude Pundit has a problem with all of this. He can’t just sweep it under the rug, say he trusts Obama, go about his daily life, and be glad that he’s not get­ting at­tacked. F*ck that. He didn’t sign up for this. He’s not gonna pre­tend it’s okay be­cause it’s not. And if it takes our Eu­ro­pean al­lies and the human rights or­ga­ni­za­tions we have trusted for decades to smack us back into re­ality, then, please, slap away at our con­torted faces.

Reading gave me the de­lightful sense that I had just stum­bled over some in­tro­duc­tory ma­te­rial or com­men­tary from the gal­leys of Harlan El­lison’s newest but as yet un­pub­lished col­lec­tion of short sto­ries and anec­dotes. And that is al­ways a feeling well worth having!


New Civil War: photo of graffiti protesting murder by US drones in Sana, Yemen.

FEATURED IMAGE: Graf­fiti protesting murder by US drones on the wall of a building in the vil­lage of Sana in Yemen. An at­tack in De­cember 2013 killed about a dozen people and a Human Rights Watch in­ves­ti­ga­tion con­cluded that “some, if not all” were civilians.


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