trump and forbes and the one that got away

I'M NOT FEELING WELL. It could be some late-Summer thing or an ad­vance taste of what the up­com­ing flu sea­son has in store for us. But it's a low-grade headache and fever, sore and swollen throat (that makes me squeak when I try to talk, so I don't) (which some con­sider a bless­ing), and Grate Grom­mett in Heaven do my mus­cles ache!

That said, I'm not sleep­ing well these past few days so when I get that first BIG mug of Café Bustelo into me in the morn­ing I'm a wee bit gid­dier than on a nor­mal day. So when I read the ques­tion on Quora this morn­ing — a se­ri­ous, po­lit­i­cal ques­tion, the kind I usu­ally shy away from — I thought, What the hey — let's give it a go!

So I did.

The ques­tion was "As a lib­eral, what are some things Trump has done that you agree with?" My an­swer can be found in­dented be­tween the im­ages be­low:


Front cover of Forbes magazine with Donald Trump.

This photo was taken at a party where Mr Trump and his guests were play­ing cha­rades af­ter din­ner, in this case, the cat­e­gory was pop­u­lar songs and Don­ald was try­ing to get his team to guess Katy Perry's "The One That Got Away."

That might be kinda kinky

The ques­tion is, “As a lib­eral, what are some things Trump has done that you agree with?” My an­swer may me­an­der a bit from what the ques­tioner hoped for, but I’m go­ing to me­an­der any­way:

He al­lowed Stormy Daniels to spank him with a rolled-up Forbes mag­a­zine. I’m into mag­a­zines, never hav­ing had the courage to move up to a ping-pong pad­dle let alone a rid­ing crop or swag­ger stick.

And there’s the courage part: even as ad­ven­tur­ous a lib­eral as I am — and you all know how dar­ing we can be — I have never ever al­lowed a woman to spank me with a rolled-up Forbes mag­a­zine, let alone one with a pic­ture of a guy on it!

I have al­ways drawn the line and only al­lowed women to spank me with a rolled-up Na­tion mag­a­zine. Since the In­ter­net, it’s a frac­tion of its old size — what mag­a­zine isn’t, you might ask — and it’s on light­weight newsprint.

And I usu­ally use one with a neu­tral photo on the cover, not a guy.

(Well, be­ing a lapsed Catholic, if the Pope was on the cover that might be kinda kinky.

(And ap­pro­pri­ate.)

But Forbes … Wow! That’s a pretty se­ri­ous, heavy-hitting pub­li­ca­tion: lots more pages than the wee­nie Na­tion and they’re on qual­ity pa­per with a heav­ier weight. I mean, Forbes packs a wal­lop!

It could re­ally, you know, h-u-r-t!

That’s all I have to say . . .


Forbes: front cover of The Nation magazine with article on radical popes.

I like the how the Ben Shahn-like draw­ing gives the Pope a pro­le­tariat look and feel.

About the Forbes thing

Yeah, about the Forbes thing: I've had my fun and the Café Bustelo has worn down a lit­tle so I thought I'd end on a sober note. This is from an ar­ti­cle ti­tled "Why Stormy Daniels Prob­a­bly Didn't Spank Trump With A Forbes Mag­a­zine" by staff writer Chase Peterson-Withorn:

"The tale of Stormy Daniels spank­ing Don­ald Trump with a mag­a­zine with his face on the cover has made count­less head­lines over the past two months. Since the al­le­ga­tions sur­faced, spec­u­la­tion has run ram­pant about which pub­li­ca­tion the porn star al­legedly used to do the deed in 2006.

Per­haps the most com­mon sug­ges­tion [is] Forbes, which ran a story on Trump and his chil­dren in its 2006 Forbes 400 is­sue. Trump ap­pears on the magazine’s cover, stand­ing with Don­ald Jr. at his left and Ivanka Trump at his right. Given Trump’s long­time ob­ses­sion with his spot on the Forbes 400 list, Forbes seemed like a log­i­cal as­sump­tion.

There’s just one prob­lem: the spank­ing al­legedly oc­curred in July 2006, months be­fore that is­sue hit news­stands."

As some­one once fa­mous once said, "And so it goes . . ."