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THIS GALLERY OF PHOTOS of Southwest Airline stewardesses from the 1970s was inspired by my search for an appropriate photo for my previous post, “O My Goddess! Women Flying Without Men.” (Which actually turned up rather lean results.) I decided on doing this gallery when I came across the Pinterest page Flight Attendant and couldn’t stop scrolling down, gawking at the photos.
Rather than tease readers into this post with a photo of a beautiful stewardess, the photo at the top of this page is of a contemporary Boeing 737 in flight. Southwest Airlines brags of having more than 400 of these beasties in their fleet. I opted for this image over a more appropriate photo of a ’70s plane because it captures the look and ‘feel’ of a massive artifact taking unnatural wing.
A vision of Gaea by Anselm Feuerbach, Academy of Fine Arts Vienna (1875).
I stress the word unnatural: While scientists and engineers have long colluded with governments, education, and the media in a conspiracy to convince us wage-earners that heavier-than-air flight is possible, those of us with even a smidgen of Greek in our blood know the truth!
Just as we (semi) Greeks know the real uses for Windex, we know that objects heavier than the air around them can only leave the earth and take flight due to the grace of Gaia (or Gaea), Goddess of Earth; consort of Uranus, Pontus, Aether and, Tartarus; and mother to Uranus, Pontus, Hecatonchires, Nereus, Thaumus, Phorcys, Ceto, Eurybia, Aergia, Typhon, and Python (among many others).
Thank the (very, very busy) Goddess and let’s move on . . .
This is the picture that inspired me to assemble this gallery of photos. Why? Because the look and the pose of this beautiful young woman reminded me of Ann-Margret.
Forty years ago, it appears that long long long lean legs were required for this job. The only reason I can think of for this decision is that the length allows the stewardess to sway gracefully during moments of turbulence.
I look at this photo and I get this odd urge to chant, “Meeska mooska, Mouseketeer” . . . but I know that’s not right.
I think I said something about long leans legs, didn’t I?
The only thing this 1979 advertisement lacks is long hair with a blown-back, feathered style on the blonde and someone named Charlie.
The ’70s was a time when even men who looked like Mr. Bean had their own pair of dazzling young stewardesses on every flight! Wait . . . could this be Charlie?
I look at this photo and I think I see Jaclyn Smith, fifth from the right in the top row. Wait . . . the guy at the end—could this be Charlie?
I suppose asking for stiletto heels would have been a wee bit impractical—and it would probably have worked against the sway-factor of those long long long lean legs.
Wow! Look at that tail ...
Mystically liberal Virgo enjoys long walks alone in the city at night in the rain with an umbrella and a flask of 10-year-old Laphroaig who strives to live by the maxim, “It ain’t what you know that gets you into trouble; it’s what you know that just ain’t so.
I’ve been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate, a poet, a pawn, and a college dropout (twice!). Occupationally, I have been a bartender, jewelry engraver, bouncer, landscape artist, and FEMA crew chief following the Great Flood of ’72 (and that was a job that I should never, ever have left).
I am also the final author of the original O’Sullivan Woodside price guides for record collectors and the original author of the Goldmine price guides for record collectors. As such, I was often referred to as the Price Guide Guru, and—as everyone should know—it behooves one to heed the words of a guru. (Unless, of course, you’re the Beatles.)
